2012
Banks are Corrupt Even at the Bottom
So, I started working as a Personal Banker for one of the major banks last December 2011. Out of the big banks, it’s rated not only as one of the better banks but also has a reputation for better customer service. Although it’s a low paying job, I was excited to get in with the company. Because it’s a massive company with locations throughout the US, I wanted to do well and hopefully take a position near my family in a year or two. I had thought that I would grow and retire with the company. Well, these thoughts were in December. Wow…..was I wrong.
When I started with the company, the Occupy movement against the big banks were always on the news. I understood their frustrations, but I didn’t think it concerned me too much because as a Personal Banker, I deal with the everyday people – the checking and savings accounts, car loans, credit cards, etc. I went through training in December, and as of January 2012, I began my rookie quarter inside the bank.
What is a Personal Banker? The Personal Banker’s role is two fold. First, it’s my job to service and maintain the customer’s account. And second, it’s a sales position. We get sales credit for opening up new checking, savings, CD’s, credit cards, car loans, home equity, and referring business to our partners within the bank such as merchant sales, home loans, brokerage accounts, etc.
In the beginning, the idea of servicing/maintaining customer accounts and selling products didn’t seem too bad. But once I got in, my eyes were opened to a whole new world, and it’s not good. Let me start off by saying that’ it’s 2am as I write this. I’ve been so stressed at work that I woke up at 1am, and I haven’t been able to go back to sleep. So, here I am.
As I started in the branch in January, the new manager at the branch started off with a group meeting. He seemed genuine and told us that his number one job as a branch manager is to help the customer. So far, everything seemed great. The meeting was over breakfast at Denny’s, and I felt like this was going to be a good company to work for. Then we started working. Being brand new, I was lost. I did exactly what my manager told me to do. Many of our customers had accounts that were not being met by the minimum monthly balance to waive the monthly service fees. The bank, within the last few months, had grandfathered these old accounts, and if the customer needed to be in an account that required a smaller balance requirement to waive the monthly service fees then we would need to put them into one of the new accounts.
So everyday, I stand behind a teller and check to see if the customer is getting charged monthly service fees, and if so, how can I help them so that I can either reduce or waive those fees. A lot of the customers were appreciative of us for catching the fees and trying to help them. I was surprised by how many people didn’t even want to hear us out even though we wanted to help them reduce their fees. I’ve heard that our company is a “rinky dink” or “Mickey Mouse” operation. I didn’t understand these customers at first because all I wanted to do was help them.
But what I quickly realized is that when the customer is not meeting the required balance to waive the fees, the branch manager wanted us to open up brand new accounts for them. It seemed okay for the first couple of weeks until I realized that we could just convert the old accounts to the new accounts without changing the account numbers. Why is this important? First, as a customer, if you have direct deposit like a paycheck from payroll or social security coming into the account, you would have to do whatever you needed to do to redirect it to the new account number. If you have automatic payments coming in or out (monthly bills) of your account, you would need to change all of these over to the new account number. Basically, yes, it would reduce your monthly service fees, but what a hassle it is for the customer to switch everything over. So, why do we as bankers convince the customer to open a new account? Each account is a sale! And the Personal Banker position is a sales position. The manager pushes us to open new accounts because the branch needs to make a quota everyday. And if the branch doesn’t meet it’s quota, the Distrcit Manager is upset with the Branch Manager.
So once I realized that we could convert the accounts, it didn’t sit well with me. I would look at the customer’s account to see if there was any sort of direct deposit or automatic payments coming in or out. If there was, I converted the account. If there wasn’t, I opened a new account so I don’t get in trouble. Even without the direct deposits or automatic payments, I still didn’t like opening new accounts because if the customer write checks then they would need to order new checks which, of course, will incur a fee. If we just converted the account, the account number would stay the same and the customer could still keep using their old checks.
One day in late January or early February, the Branch Manager asked me to sit with a customer who has been getting hit with monthly service fees. She was this sweet older woman, about 80 years old, but she had her wits about her. I looked at the account, and she was being charged $30 a month for not meeting the balance requirement. I looked into her checking account, and she had social security check coming into the account. She had an automatic payment to Metlife for an insurance product, an autopay to Rite-Aid for her pharmacy, and one to Walgreens for another reason. There was no way I’m opening up a new account for her. I sat with her and told her that I was only going to convert her account. Her account number would remain the same. She wouldn’t have to make any phone calls or anything to re-route the Social Security checks and automatic payments. She was very pleased with what I had to say. As I was just about finished explaining this to the customer, my Branch Manager walked up behind me and said, “maam, my banker is a new employee, and he made a mistake. Unfortunately, to waive the fees on your account, we would need to open up a new account. We won’t close out the old account just yet. We’ll make sure your direct deposit and othe automatic payments are going through the new account before we close out your old one. That way, everything is done smoothly, and you won’t have any interruption with your banking needs.” How do you do that to an 80 year old woman? She understood, and I opened up a brand new checking, savings, and debit card. So, I got three sales out of her. Yes, even the debit card is a sale. What’s funny (sad) is that you can link or de-link any account on your debit card. So, she could have kept her old debit card, and I could have just linked the new accounts to it. But, it’s a sale. So, we sent her a new debit card for the new accounts. Couple of weeks later, she had problems with her new checks and old accounts. For a while, I couldn’t even look at her. I felt so ashamed of what we did to her.
Okay…it’s 3:25 am now. I need to get back to sleep. The kid will wake up in few hours, and I have to go back to work. But this is the first of many bank stories. To be cont…….
2011
A New Puzzle
I used to be a very happy and confident person. I can honestly say that I was one of the most laid back and easy going person I knew. Nothing really fazed me. Since the death of my gf and becoming a single parent, I’ve been depressed, lost and scared. I tried to put up a front that I’m still the same person, but there were so many days of anxiety and anger. It wouldn’t be till later that I realized that the front I put up was only fooling me. This was the scariest part. I thought time heals all, but after waiting and waiting, I started to think, what if this feeling doesn’t go away? What if this feeling of anxiety and irritability is just a part of my life? Will I never feel happy the way I once did? And of course, these thoughts brought on more anxiety.
It was mid July 2011. It was a rare occasion that Izzy went to sleep early. I had the night to myself. I made some hot tea and turned on the t.v. to see if Sportscenter was on ESPN. Although I was happy to have the night to relax and enjoy a little peace, my body started to feel uncomfortable. I couldn’t sit still, and I could feel the anxiety coming on. The night was cool, but I was suffocating. I had to open all the windows to get some air. The anxiety was overwhelming. My mind was racing. What if something should happen to me? Izzy would be all alone. She would be without a parent. I haven’t even done a will. Not that I have money to give her, but who I would designate to take care of her. She doesn’t know how to call 911, family or friends. I envisioned her crying and lost. A little 4 year old unlocking the doors and walking to a neighbors house to get help in the middle of the night. I had not done the basic necessities for her if something should go wrong. When people close to you die left and right, you know that this is a very real possibility. And that’s when the anxiety happens.
As I started thinking of all the things I needed to do to make sure that Izzy is taken care of in case of an emergency, I started feeling better. And then, something remarkable happened. For the last few years, I was trying to put the pieces of my life back together. I felt soooo lost at times because with all my efforts, the puzzle was not coming together. My life really felt like a broken puzzle….scattered. How can I feel happy unless I can piece the puzzle back together again? And in that instant, It hit me. I realized that the pieces that I’m working with is for a new puzzle. The picture of the puzzle that I had in my mind is a different picture than the picture on this new puzzle. Unfortunately, unlike a real puzzle, I don’t have a box to see what the picture should look like, but there came a huge weight off my shoulders like I figured something out….something big. To recognize that my life is a new puzzle was a monumental hurdle, and with it, came an amazing sense of relief. Having said that, the puzzle is still broken, but I feel like I’m now starting at zero and not a negative number. I still need to put the puzzle together, but for the first time, I’m looking at it with an open mind to see what the picture will be instead of trying to cram the pieces to a picture it’s not.
2011
McDonald’s in Udon Thani, Thailand
I’ve been here for almost three weeks now. Izzy has been asking me to go to McDonald’s several times. I don’t know if she really likes the food, but I know for sure she wants the Happy Meal to get a toy. With the neighborhood bowl of wonton noodle soup costing me 30 bahts (about $1.00), going to McDonald’s is like going to Ruth’s Chris Steak House…. not for the quality but for the price. But I felt guilty. The McDonald’s here is spotless. Like most of the foreign chain establishments here, they really keep it clean. To my surprise, they have a Double Big Mac here. that’s four tiny patties instead of two. I had to try it. Izzy got, of course, the cheeseburger Happy Meal with the toy. When I saw the Double Big Mac, it looked just like the Big Mac but bigger. I was happy……..then I tried it. Wow…it sucked. Not sure if they don’t put any seasoning in it or what, but it didn’t taste anything like a Big Mac. Very little sauce, and it was kind of greasy. The beef actually tasted disgusting. Maybe McDonald’s think that’s how Thai people like their beef….disgusting, but it didn’t agree with me. I couldn’t eat it. I thought maybe it’s because there’s too much meat in here. So, I took two patties out to make it a regular size Big Mac. Nope, it was still disgusting. I know I’ll be going to the bathroom sometime tonight. As for the fries and coke, it tasted pretty much the same. Now the only thing that I thought was good was that they have a pineapple pie instead of apple or cherry. Not only do they have the pineapple pie, but they deep fry it like the way McDonald’s used to do in the states. It was crispy and hot. Other than that, I have to say that I probably won’t be going back to McDonald’s until I get back to the states. Nasty!!
2010
Starving
It’s been 1 week since jaw surgery. I went to the doctor today to loosen up my mouthpiece. I’m able to breathe much easier and much of the pain is gone. But now I’m super hungry. A liquid diet was okay the first few days, but it’s getting to me now. I’ve lost roughly 12 -13 lbs in the last week. Dr. wants me on a liquid diet for the next 3 weeks. This is going to be rough.
2010
to my brother and sisters
thank God for my brother (including brother in law) and my sisters. Without them, my recovery would be so much more difficult.
2010
Orthognastic (jaw) Surgery
Since I was in college, I’ve always wanted to get braces. When I smile, if you look at me at a certain angle, I look like I’m missing a tooth, and my upper front two teeth come out forward enough where I look like I have buck teeth. I’ve seen a few orthodontists, and they all agreed that it was pointless to get braces without getting jaw surgery. My upper jaw never grew out enough to match my lower jaw. So, if you looked at me from the side, my lower jaw looks like it’s protruding out. So the doctors would have to break my upper jaw and pull it forward.
I guess I started at a bad time to do my P90x. Last Friday I had surgery on my mouth. I was told that my jaw would be wired shut for 3 weeks. Only a liquid diet during that time. Then soft foods for another 3 weeks. So, a total of 6 weeks and I would lose about 10% of my body weight. I thought this would be a good time to do P90x because it would force me to diet whether I liked it or not. I always thought the diet was the hardest part, and this would give me a good opportunity to take advantage of it.
Well last Friday, after 2 years of having braces, I finally had the operation. I’m freakin miserable. The doctor said I that I would be congested for 1-2 weeks. On top of that, not only is my mouth wired shut, but there is a mouth piece in there to hold everything in place. So very little air is going in and out through my mouth, and I’m congested. I’m having the worst time breathing right now. It was so tough to breathe the first 2 days that I started having anxiety. I started thinking of my own death, and it scared me to hell to think that Bizzy would be parentless. It made my cry, and the anxiety made it more difficult to breathe.
I only stayed one night at the hospital. My brother picked me up and took me to my sister’s house so she could watch me. I was given a ton of medicine. Out of all of them, the most impressive was Afrin. It’s a nasal decongestant that worked miraculously. I like instant gratification, and this was one of them. Within minutes, my sinus cleared up and I could breathe, and my anxiety decreased as well. But like all good things, there’s a catch. I was told I could only take this for 3 days max. After 3 days, the Afrin works backwards, and I will be more congested than ever. This was a very scary thought. I’ve used it 2 days now. Today at noon, will be my last use. It won’t be the full 3 days, but I don’t want to take any chances. The idea of being that congested scares me a lot. The worst case scenerio, the doctor told me to cut off my mouth piece so I can breathe. If I have to do that, the scary part is the moments leading up to that. I must be suffocating to do that.
As for Bizzy, she’s being watched by my sisters. She’ll stay at one house for a few days and go to my other sister’s tonight. Sounds like she’s doing very well. I miss her so much and wish I could see her, but I look like a monster. My 12 year old niece saw me when I arrived from the hospital, and she has not looked at me since. She told her mother that I look scary, and she was a little scared of me. If that’s the case, I can’t imagine what my 3 year old daughter will think if she saw me. So, I’ll go home today for the next couple of days and hope my breathing will get better. If my face is less swollen, then I will come back and see Bizzy again when I’m not a monster.
2010
First Jog
About a week and a half, I went for a jog, and I couldn’t go farther than a quarter mile without stopping. Not because I was out of breath but because my quads felt so heavy that I couldn’t lift them anymore. To put it in layman’s terms, it sucked. It was one of those feelings where I hoped no one had seen me stop, and I was pretty depressed to know where I stood with my conditioning.
Mentally, I’m at a point that I’m tired of feeling like I do and will fight through the pain and struggles. This is huge for me. Without being ready mentally, I know that I could not follow physically. So today, I decided to go for a jog again. The route overlooks the ocean in Long Beach and about 2 miles long. So it’s 4 miles to the end and back. I was a little hesitant before the jog because I remember how difficult it was a week and a half ago. I decided to go for a walk jog. Jog when I can and walk when I need to. So I started off walking for the first 3 blocks to warm up, and I then started my jog. I knew, if I jogged at the pace of my last jog, my body would give out soon. I decided to take a much slower pace. Slower than what I used to jog but faster than walking. My goal was to keep the pace as long as I could.
I focused my sights on the ground about 5 feet in front of me. When I looked up, I mentally got more tired just seeing how much farther I had to go, and if I thought someone was looking at me, I would pick up the pace to show that I’m in good shape. But this would throw me off my pace and get me tired more. Being this out of shape not only gets me tired more, but it’s also more difficult to recover when I exert more energy. So, I kept my head down and kept on going. I also played slow songs on my iphone. I was afraid that if I played fast music with a beat that I would want to jog faster. I’m just not there yet. I even need to work up to fast music.
At the half-way point, I was pretty pleased that I made it without stopping. The slow pace helped a lot. My quads felt okay, but I could feel it in my hip joints. It was the kind of pain that comes from non-use. It was sore, but it was the good kind of pain. I stopped at the half-way point for about 1-2 minutes to take a quick breath and take a picture of the view of my route. It’s hard to enjoy the view when you’re struggling. I was dreading the jog back, but to my surprise, I actually made it all the way back. I walked the last 3 blocks home to cool down. I was tired. I estimate that I jogged about 3 miles of the 4 mile route. Because I was able to jog most of the route, it not only made me feel a little better about myself, but I also want to do this again soon.
2010
Day 1
Yesterday, I did the Pre-day 1 assessment for P90x. I woke up sore just from the assessment. I think part of writing this blog about P90x will give me accountability and force me to do it consistently. So today, I woke up and did Chest and Back. Wow… that’s a lot of push-ups. I can see why it works. It wasn’t one of those 5 minute a day ab cruncher miracles. It was a full on workout. By the end, I needed a nap and felt a little light headed with nausea. Thank God I don’t see this workout for another week. Anyway, here are my results.
Reps in Round 1/Round 2
Push-ups 15 / 12
Pull-ups 6 / 2
Military push-ups 10 / 5
Chin-ups 7 / 2.5
Wide push-ups 15 / 10
Closed grip pull-ups 3 / 2
Decline push-ups 10 / 10
Heavy Pants 12reps@35lb / same
Diamond push-ups 5 / 2
Lawnmower 12@35lb / same
Dive Bomber 5 / 4.5
Back fly 10 / 10 used elastic band
2010
Pre-Day 1 of P90x
Ok…. I decided to try P90x. I bought the program about 3 years ago but both the program and myself have been sitting around the whole time. After three deaths and becoming a single father, doing any type of exercise didn’t interest me. It was a little weird because I used to love playing basketball and surfing, but the longer I sat around, I noticed a tremendous loss of strength and energy. I used to live in San Francisco and played basketball on the weekends for 2-3 hours at Lowell High School. After basketball, I would occasionally jog Lake Merced at about an 8 minute mile pace. The lake is about 4.2 miles long, but I alway cut across a bridge that cut the distance to 3.5 miles. I also used to surf Ocean Beach. If you’re a surfer and know Ocean Beach, you know it’s not for beginners. Even on small days, there’s a lot of volume to the waves and the currents are always very strong. Just to paddle out takes a lot of cardio, energy and stamina. So, although I never had the body I always wanted, when it came to sports, I felt like I was an athlete and in good shape.
Before my mother passed away, I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes in 2004. I was only 33 at the time. I didn’t take it very seriously because I was exercising so much, and I really just needed to watch my food intake. But after the deaths, watching what I eat was not on my mind. In fact, eating was one of the few things that brought me any type of joy. So now, I wasn’t exercising, and I was eating anything and everything. Not only was I not exercising, but I used to find myself just sitting on the sofa with the TV on all the time. I didn’t even go for a walk. I remember there were days when I sat on the sofa and not a word came out of my mouth for a couple of days straight. After 3 years, I feel physically and mentally horrible. Because of the diabetes and the lack of exercise, there are days when I’m just physically drained. And when you’re physically drained, you don’t have enough strength to do anything mental either. They’re definitely connected.
So the last 3 years consisted of taking care of a baby, paying off all my debts, trying to figure out my life, and being depressed. Well, I’m tired of feeling depressed, I’ve paid off all my debts, I’m taking good care of Bizzy, but I’m still trying to figure out my life. That’s another post, LOL.
So couple of weeks ago, my sister was babysitting Bizzy all day. It gave me a whole day off, and I decided to go for a jog. I wanted to test out my cardio, but within 200 yards, my quads were burning so bad that I had to stop before being out of breath. It was depressing and embarrassing.
So here I am. I’m ready to start a better life. After 3 years, I finally put in one of the discs of P90x for the first time. I’ve had it for 3 years and never put in a single disc. Well, it’s about time I stop wasting my money on this program. So, here are some of my results for pre-day 1 of P90x.
Push-ups: 37
Pull-ups: 6
Vertical Jump: 20.5
In & Outs: 41
Bicep Curl: 12 reps @ 35 lb
Wall Squat: 1 minute 49 second
Toe Touch: +1.5 inch
Weight: 189 lb
Body Fat: 16%
2010
Loss and Gain of interest
Bizzy pulls out a toy and plays with it for about a minute then goes and gets the next one. Within an hour, the house is cluttered with every book, toy, and stuffed animal. She loses interest in everything she takes out, but then she gains interest when I’m about to clean it up. What’s up with that?